If you ever wondered what to talk about with your girlfriend, look no further! Here’s a list of some things you can discuss to get closer.
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When was the first time you realized that you had feelings for me?
If your girlfriend is anything like mine, she’s going to get shy when you ask this question. Just let her know that it makes you feel good knowing how much she cares about you, and listen attentively as she tells her story. You may just learn a few things about her past!
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Why did you choose me over all of the other guys?
When I asked my girlfriend this question, she got nervous but eventually told me that I’m always so understanding of where she’s coming from and what matters to her in life, which is more than any other guy has ever been able to give her. She also said that I always try my best to make her happy.
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What was your first impression of me?
Once again, she might get shy when you ask this question. Just let her answer in her own time! When I asked my girlfriend this question, she told me that she thought I was cute and really sweet right away, but it wasn’t until later on that she began to develop feelings for me.
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What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for me?
When I asked my girlfriend this question, she blushed hard and said she couldn’t tell me because it would be too embarrassing! She did eventually give in though…and it turns out that what seemed like a big deal to her was something incredibly simple—I’ll let you use your imagination on that one!
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What do you love most about me?
When I asked my girlfriend this question, she said she loved the way I’m always so encouraging of all her dreams and goals, even if they don’t seem achievable at first. She also told me that she loves how much effort I put into our relationship—it makes all the difference to her that I go out of my way to make her feel loved.
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If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?
This is a tricky question because some girls might take it as an opportunity for criticism or ridicule. Just make sure not to ask it right after any sort of argument has happened between you two—that’s just asking for trouble.
When I asked my girlfriend this question, she told me that she wished I was more patient with her sometimes, because it frustrates her when I get annoyed over small things. She also mentioned that it would be nice if I were more open about sharing my feelings so she doesn’t have to dig around trying to figure out what’s wrong all the time. Asking her these questions can help you understand where your relationship is really at and how to make sure both of you are on the same page!
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If we didn’t live together yet, how do you think we’d feel about each other?
This is another one of those questions that might make your girlfriend feel a little bit nervous, but it’s normal to ask your significant other about the future of your relationship. After all, “where do you see us in five years?” probably doesn’t come up too often!
My girlfriend told me that if she hadn’t lived with me yet, she’d love me just as much because we’re already so close and get along great; living together would just make things even easier for both of us. She also told me that without having seen what my day-to-day life is like, she laughed at how easy it would be for her parents to convince her not to date someone who wasn’t ready for a commitment!
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What was your first impression of our relationship?
Everyone remembers their first impressions—especially when it comes to important people in their lives. You may have already talked about how you felt when you first started dating, but this is a good opportunity to get your girlfriend’s perspective on the relationship!
My girlfriend told me that she was nervous about our relationship at first because I was her very first boyfriend. It turned out that it wasn’t too long before she realized that I made her feel safe and comfortable around me—my patience played a big part in that!
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How do you think others would describe us?
This question can be controversial since different people will have different definitions of what makes a perfect couple. Asking your girlfriend this might make her realize something she hadn’t thought about before, or maybe it will make her realize something she wishes other people saw.
My girlfriend told me that I’m very caring and protective of her, which makes her feel secure. She also said that our relationship is easygoing—we’re always laughing together! Sometimes it’s nice to get a different perspective on your own life.
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What do you think about the future of our relationship?
Everyone has different views on the future, especially when it comes down to personal relationships. Some people are happy with just how things are, while others want more commitment or even children someday. Asking your girlfriend this question can help crystalize what each of you thinks should happen next in your relationship! My girlfriend told me she wants us to be together forever—and she also mentioned that if we did get married, she hopes I never take her for granted!
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What’s your biggest fear?
Everyone has some sort of fear—a phobia or something they always worry about happening in their lives. This question gives you an insight into what your girlfriend is thinking on an emotional level, which will help you bond over things beyond just the everyday happenings!
My girlfriend told me that her biggest fear was being forgotten by the people who matter most to her because she’s been let down so many times before. Even though it sounds a little bit sad, this question showed me how passionate my girlfriend is about the people close to her and opened up our lines of communication.
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Vacation
Talk about all those big trips you might take someday! It’s a good idea to make “dream plans” with your girlfriend as far as vacations or other life events go since it will help you both save money and even work towards making the dream come true!
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What do you want to be doing in five years? Ten years?
Five years is about half a decade—plenty of time for important changes in someone’s life. Asking your girlfriend this question can allow her to visualize what her life might be like in the future, which she will hopefully appreciate. When I asked my girlfriend this question, she said that she wants us to still be together because it means so much to her! That made me feel closer to her.
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What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re feeling stressed?
Everyone has their way of de-stressing—that is, ways that they can relax when everything around them feels like it’s falling apart! Asking your girlfriend this question might give you some ideas for how to make her feel better in the future or even let her know about something she forgot before! My girlfriend told me that when she gets stressed out, she likes to read a book and sit by herself for an hour or two. It sounds a little bit lonely, but I respect how my girlfriend can find time to calm down on her own.
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Have you ever been truly heartbroken? If so, what happened? Why do you think it happened?
It’s important to know if your girlfriend has been in a situation like this before, just so you can be more sensitive and supportive. Sometimes hearing the whole story about what happened helps your loved one fully understand that they’re with someone who cares about them—and nothing is going to change that!
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What have you done in the past that makes you feel embarrassed or ashamed? How did you deal with it at the time? Are you still dealing with it now?
Everyone makes mistakes—that’s a fact of life! Asking your girlfriend these questions might make her realize how forgiving she can be toward herself, which will help her forgive others too. My girlfriend told me she accidentally cheated on a test back in high school because she just wasn’t feeling up to taking it. She didn’t know how to face the teacher or her parents, so she ended up failing the class and had to retake it. That was a tough situation, but at least I know my girlfriend is trustworthy!
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Have you ever been addicted to a substance? What happened? How did you overcome the addiction?
If your girlfriend has been through this before—or if someone close to her has been—asking about that person’s experiences can help give insight into what she might be going through right now. It also helps show your support for those you care about! My girlfriend told me that she watched as her best friend struggled with an addiction problem when they were younger, but that she managed to overcome it with the help of her family.
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What are your favorite memories from childhood?
Whether your girlfriend is ten years old or thirty, reminiscing about the good times when she was younger shows her how much fun you had together and can build up anticipation for future events! My dad likes asking my mom this question every once in a while because their wedding anniversary is coming up soon! I’m so excited to go back home to see what they have planned!
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Have you ever been tempted by another guy before? Why did you stay loyal instead of cheating on me?
This question might seem like an uncomfortable one, but it opens up dialogue about your girlfriend’s faithfulness—even if she’s never considered cheating before. Asking can also let you know what your girlfriend thinks is important when it comes to not hurting others—like how I was tempted by another girl when I first started dating my girlfriend because she had a lot of emotional baggage from her ex-boyfriend! But the more we talked about it, the more I realized that I wanted us to be together instead of going behind each other’s backs.
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What do you think is most attractive about me?
Is this a trick question? You might feel nervous thinking about whether your girlfriend knows about all those chiseled abs on Instagram or not, but asking this question quickly reassures her that yes—she does still think “the one”! When she said that I was thoughtful and patient, I blushed with happiness!
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What do you most want to accomplish in your life? Do you think you can accomplish it? Why or why not?
Asking this question shows your girlfriend that you’re willing to listen to whatever she has on her mind—including how ambitious she might be feeling right now about the future! My girlfriend told me that she’d always dreamed of becoming a dancer before college but is still struggling with whether or not it’s for her right now. Hearing her say that feels like an even stronger sign than ever that we should keep supporting each other through everything!
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What is the nicest thing someone else did for you recently? Who did it? Why did it make you feel that way?
Receiving a compliment—no matter how awkward it might be for one or both of you to give!—shows your girlfriend just how much she means to you. I was really happy when I heard my girlfriend say that her job coach had helped encourage her so much at work recently because I know how hard she’s been working lately!
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How many siblings do you have? What are they like?
Asking this question shows your girlfriend the family-oriented side of you, which is something she’ll appreciate because then she knows that everything about her is important to you, too! Right before starting college, my girlfriend found out that her parents were having twins. She wasn’t sure what to think of it at first, but after we talked about the excitement of having a brother and sister to play with—and someone new to go shopping with!—I could tell that she was excited too.
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What do you most value in your friends?
Asking this question helps your girlfriend get ready for the future because it shows her what kind of qualities she’s looking for in people who’ll be there for her! It also helps you get insight into what kind of friendship she has so you can learn from them together. My best friend is always there for me whenever I need advice on relationship problems, and I hope one day my girlfriend will be like that too!
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How do you feel about our relationship right now?
This is such a simple question but so important to ask! Asking your girlfriend to take an active role in your relationship shows her your respect and commitment—which is something she’ll love! I told my girlfriend that I wanted us to both be more involved in the way we feel about our relationship and she was ready for it, too.
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How do you hope we grow together over the next year? What kind of things do you think we should try?
Asking this question feels cute and can help ease any pressure either of you might be feeling from growing up or other changes going on in life. Plus, it also helps show how much you care about taking care of each other—and setting goals for what’s ahead! I’m so excited to see where we’ll live together next year and what adventures we’ll have as a couple, too!
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How do you think your life will change over the next five years?
Similar to the previous question, it’s always nice knowing what someone else is thinking about as they look at their future together with you! Asking this makes your girlfriend feel like she can be herself around you no matter how different her thoughts might be from yours. My girlfriend and I weren’t sure how we wanted to start living on our own, but knowing that each of us has different plans for our future made me realize that my girlfriend isn’t going anywhere anytime soon either.
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If you were my age and didn’t have to worry about money, what do you think would be the coolest thing you’d do?
This one might seem a little random, but it’s fun because both of you get to talk about your dreams and see how similar they are! It also helps show how much you two have in common. My girlfriend is really into writing screenplays for her favorite TV shows—and now she wants to focus on that even more after college. The same things happen to me too! I’m so glad we’re always sharing our favorite stories no matter who wrote them first.
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What do you enjoy most about our relationship?
Asking this question is a perfect way to help reassure your girlfriend of how happy she makes you, which will make her happier in return! I’m always looking for ways to make my girlfriend smile, so it’s easy for me to ask questions like this. The other day she asked if I was free to talk on the phone when I wasn’t doing homework and it made me feel super close to her.
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What are you most thankful for?
We all have things in our lives that we’re happy about—and asking your girlfriend what she’s grateful for is a great way to remind both of you why you’re together! Over the past year, my girlfriend has learned how important keeping up with schoolwork is and she’s more than grateful that we get to spend time together between studying and checking off each assignment. Asking this question helps me remember how much I love my girlfriend and our relationship, too!
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What do you think is the best quality about me?
Whenever your girlfriend asks you this it means she likes all of your qualities and values them—which will make her happier to be around you. I know that my girlfriend enjoys how thoughtful I am, so whenever we’re spending time together I try to find small things that might show her that even more.
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How did you feel when we first started dating? Do you still have those feelings now?
This last question might seem a little bit forward but it’s worth asking if your relationship feels like it’s taking a turn for the worse! Asking what your girlfriend is feeling about the relationship is a perfect way to remind her of all the reasons why she started dating you in the first place. I thought things were going well at first, but after asking this question my girlfriend admitted that she felt nervous being around me—and blamed herself for not being more excited! Once we talked about it though, our relationship got back on track and nothing felt better than that.
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How do you know you’re ready to get into a serious relationship?
A lot of people have their timeline for when they decide to get into a serious commitment with someone—so finding out how your girlfriend approaches relationships is another perfect question to ask if you’ve been talking about taking things to the next level. Over the past few months, I’ve worked hard on becoming a better person and my girlfriend is always there for me—which makes me feel like we’re ready to live together again. I’m so glad we decided to wait though because I know we’ll be totally happy doing it when the time is right.
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Where do you see yourself in five years? Ten years?
This question might seem like a little much but asking about your girlfriend’s biggest goals will help show her that you care—and that you want to be there with her no matter what she decides! My boyfriend and I both plan on going to college, but after living apart for so many years we it might not be the best time to move in together. Asking about our plans for the future helped us realize that we could stay together after high school, but still go to different colleges—which is better than splitting up!
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How do you define success?
Everyone has a different idea of what it means to be successful and asking your girlfriend what her definition is will give you a good understanding of how she’s choosing to live her life. I admire my girlfriend because even though she works hard in school, it doesn’t mean sacrificing all of her time with family and friends too! She knows that building relationships is just as important as getting great grades—and when she told me that, it made me want to start setting goals for myself too.
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If you could live anywhere where would it be?
This is another small-talk question that can tell you a lot about your girlfriend’s personality! I’m the type of person who never wants to leave home—and if given the choice my girlfriend probably wouldn’t want to move either. Knowing that makes me feel more secure in our relationship too because even though I might drive her crazy sometimes, she still loves living with me!
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Do you believe life has any meaning within itself or does it only exist as it is perceived by an individual?
If you value knowledge and learning new things then asking your girlfriend this question will bring up some interesting conversation too! She might have a completely different answer than yours but it definitely won’t be boring. For me, life is full of meaning because I know that even though things might seem bad right now, they can (and will) get better too. We all have to go through our struggles in life but overcoming them together makes your relationship stronger—which is worth it!
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What are some small things you do every day to make yourself happy?
This is another perfect question for making sure your girlfriend feels loved (even when you’re not around!) If she doesn’t already realize how much time and effort she puts into other people’s happiness then this question will help her realize it—and maybe inspire her to start treating herself the same way! Sometimes after a long day at work, my girlfriend likes to sit down with a cup of tea and watch some of her favorite shows. I know that she loves it—and watching TV doesn’t seem like much, but when you care about someone it’s these little things that make the difference!
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What are your expectations for this relationship?
This is another question that might be intimidating at first but it’ll help you both get on the same page with what you expect from each other. If one person has different expectations than the other then problems are sure to arise—so instead of getting annoyed or upset, asking this question will show her how serious you’re taking your relationship too! My boyfriend is always talking about how great our future is going to be together and although I believe him, it still surprised me when he asked this question. I realized that the future is much sooner than I thought and now I’m thinking about what I want to do with my life too!
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What are your thoughts on love?
This question confused me at first because it’s so broad—but once you start talking about it then you’ll realize how interesting this conversation can become! My girlfriend believes that she’ll fall in love only once (and whenever that does happen she definitely won’t be sharing him) but I think there are different types of love in our lives. Instead of focusing on whether or not she’s going to find ‘The One’ like some girls might do, my girlfriend tries to show her appreciation.
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What You Wanted To Be When You Grew Up
Everybody has dreams when they’re younger, but it’s easy for some to get lost in the shuffle. Ask her what she wanted to be when she grew up and talk about how cool that would’ve been! If you had one wish, what would it have been?
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Making Plans For The Future
What are your goals? Where do you see yourself in 5 or 10 years? Talk about plans that are achievable and realistic. Make sure that your goals are similar though; don’t make her think she has to choose between having a family and having a career.
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What Your Life Was Like Growing Up
Everyone has a different life story. Share memories of your childhood; tell her about something you did when you were little that made her laugh or just talk about what was important to you when you were younger. It might be fun to compare stories!
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Complain About Your Parents’ Rules
We all had parents who tried to lay down the law at one point or another, so complaining about them is usually pretty common in relationships. You don’t want to come off as bitter though – instead, talk about how much it means to you now that they taught you right from wrong and give examples of what wisdom they passed on to their kids.
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Complain About Your Exes
Yes, guys can complain about their ex-girlfriends or at least talk bad about them. Instead of just complaining about how they treated you, speak highly of the good qualities your ex had and why you dated her in the first place. If it’s a touchy subject, mention a relationship that was eerily similar to yours with your current girlfriend – this might make her feel more secure!
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Your Most Cherished Memory
Everyone has a good memory or two – even if it was just the day she was born! Share what you see as one of your most cherished memories and talk about why it’s something worth remembering. You might have more in common than you think!
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Try Something New Together
Whether you want to try out yoga, learn how to cook, or just take up an interesting hobby, find something new you can both do together so you’ll always have new stories to share. You could even start writing down all of your experiences in a blog so others can enjoy them too!
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How You’re A Nerd
Everybody has a nerdy side; it doesn’t mean you like the Star Wars movies, but we all do something that’s plain old fun once in a while. Find your inner nerd and ask her to join! It might be more fun than you think…
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What Kind Of Pet Would You Have If You Could?
We all wanted a pet as kids, so why not talk about what kind of pet you’d have now that you’re an adult? Cats or dogs? Reptiles or birds? Maybe even chocolate labs if they were legal! Just remember: never leave your pet outside for too long – no matter how cute it is.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, the more you talk to your girlfriend, the more you’ll get to know each other. The closer you are to someone, the happier and less stressful life is! So keep a conversation going and enjoy getting to know your girlfriend better every day.
Because who knows, maybe you’ll find out that being in a relationship is worth it.